Han lives in Hawai‘i, home of her family since 1904.It took her more than a year after walking away from school to discover that ‘something.’ In the interim, she started a candy and dessert buffet business that catered to weddings, graduations and birthday parties.
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Her work-in-progress ‘Break’ details how to write a divorce story. A PEN and VONA fellow, she received grants from the LA Department of Cultural Affairs, and was the inaugural English Literature PhD of City Univ. Her fiction collection Swimming in Hong Kong won the Paterson Fiction Prize, and finalist for AWP’s Grace Paley Prize, the Spokane Prize, and the Asian Books Blog Award. Stephanie Han teaches women’s creative writing workshops at. Where I will feast on dark wine and rich food. In my body I feel the words I wrote decades ago: Only now, I have more faith in my own freedom. Then, it becomes a very long road to home.Ī woman is always changing, and so Estés’ revolutionary wisdom continues to hold me in thrall as I confront the words that have built and set fire to the places we all inhabit. Such are the perils of conformity-the bite of denying the self. Now, I see that my gestures pointed to my need for exterior markers of approval because I could not approve of myself. Related: Worried About the Effects of Divorce? Here’s How it Can Help You Feel More Empowered I wanted to be seen as someone who carved and curved words and actions into meaning and light. I stubbornly insisted on spelunking my way through the craft of writing, rebelling against anything and everything. When I first tore through this book, I agonized over what to write and who to please, and I was thoroughly frustrated by my inability to express what I felt. I am a different writer, reader, and woman now in all of the significant ways anyone might define these terms.
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Her words cracked open the door to my wild self, though it would take the full ride through the seasons of womanhood to finally run with the Wolf. I sent a copy to Estés, who in turn mailed me a signed postcard of thanks I still cherish. Inspired by Estés work, I wrote ‘The Wolf,’ which appeared in my poetry chapbook.īarefoot, pads crushing twigs and leaves. Back then I could not imagine the versions of being that I have since worn or rejected as I sought, hid, and faced my own truth. Hindsight is easier, but for sure, I would tell the younger me what I say to all of my students: Believe in your voice. What was I hungering for? I think it was the person I finally became-or yes, the person I am becoming. Reading the book now reminds me of all the women I knew back then, including the many versions of my own self. Who knew then that so many more selves would unfold as the years passed? My tenure as her assistant ended with her firing me, which set off a domino slide to the bottom: I lost my second job as a script analyst, got fired from the lead role in a play, and was left by a boyfriend-all which led to a collapse and gathering of a new self. The book conjures my memory of her, a woman who taught me life skills with much grace, humor, and spirit. When it showed up on the desk of my boss, a film producer, I borrowed and devoured it over a weekend. I threw everything at the canvas and had no idea what would stick. When I first read the book, my life was an abstract expressionist performance piece. Related: Move Over Midlife Crisis-Here’s How to Have a Midlife Awakening To my younger friends, I say, “It’s a classic!” To those who’ve read it before, I say, “It’s better the second time.” I recommend the book to every woman I know.
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Story after story, Estés shows us how to free ourselves. To inhabit the body as an animal, a wolf self, is to bravely claim the matriarchal directive crucial to our dignity and knowledge. Through stories, folktales, and histories that span the globe, she interprets women’s truths and movements, urging readers to heed the call of the Wild Woman. Expression.Įstés details the power of the archetypal Wild Woman and beckons us to consider how our embrace of the wolf that runs with the rhythms of nature-in sync with instinct and purpose-leads to healing ourselves and society.
With remarkable accuracy, the pages recount the contours of my life with all its jagged edges and unpredictable terrain. Clarissa Pinkola Estés groundbreaking classic, Women Who Run with the Wolves. It’s spring 2022 and I find myself opening a worn copy of Dr.
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